Undermining President Donald J. Trump’s claim that climate change is a hoax perpetuated by the Chinese as a ploy to diminish US strength, anonymous sources from the White House confirm this is merely cover for a much more sinister conspiracy.

A bombshell leak from sources close to Trump reveals that Donald Trump and Putin wish to deliberately accelerate the effects of global warming. While sources report that Putin has privately declared that he is tired of Russia being so cold, there is another, cunning motive behind the actions of the two world leaders.

I spoke with Max Levy, a physicist who studies fusion plasmas, and so is especially qualified to talk about heating things up.

“With a 7-10 degree warming to the average global temperature, we can expect the entire Siberian tundra to thaw and become the largest swath of arable land in the world,” says Levy. At the same time, much of the American West, breadbasket to the world, is expected to become hotter and dryer, crippling its agricultural capacity.

“With such an unprecedented area of land available to agriculture, we can expect the world’s population to explode,” Levy continued. “Think the entire world becoming one massive city, much like the planet Coruscant from Star Wars.”

But the population growth will mostly occur in Russia, making it an increasingly powerful player on the world stage, whereas population and economic growth will slow in the Americas and Europe.

This is where, according to the White House sources, Trump comes in. Only a real-estate developer of Trump’s caliber would be able to build all the Trump Towers needed to support such a massive global population increase.

By Nate Crossette

*Warning: this article may contain conspiracy theories.

Posted by Science Buffs

A CU Boulder STEM Blog

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